Post 3

FIVE THINGS THAT ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME AT HOUSE PARTIES. 

House parties. Places where a bunch of high school kids go to trash some poor sods house who was brave enough to hold the event there, who's only reward is being left with strange liquids in their sink and glass all over the garden. Not to mention the sick. 

The five dreaded things are as follows. (I don't really get invited to many house parties, which is because I think everyone hates me. In reality it is probably because I am a shy, introverted person. It is probably a combination of both)

1)  Losing all my friends

An introverts worst nightmare. In a crowded room, I look around and they have all just vanished. I then later catch up with them several hours after to exchange stories of what happened to them, and their stories all sound far more exciting than mine. 

Friend one: I made out with Jamie and played beer pong with the blonde girls on the stairs!
Friend two: I peed in the sink, raided the fridge and then swung from the light in the kitchen while everyone cheered me on
Me: I have spent all evening on the sofa, making no noise and pretending I don't exist. 

Every single time.

2) Claiming that random girl/boy you went to school for five years with and never spoke too once, as your best friend 
And then taking several photos with said girl/boy, giving them multiple hugs and then not making eye contact with him/her on Monday morning.

I never really know what to do with those photos afterwards. 

3) Nearly killing yourself 
Nearly falling over a wall and nearly breaking all the bones in your body as a crowd of people laugh at you.

This legitimately happened two weeks ago. 

4) Being ambushed by someone of the opposite sex you would prefer to have a restraining order of 20 miles on. 
Oh its a classic one. Sitting there, minding your own business when some creepy boy who you vaguely remember being in your art class from a few years back drags you outside for 'a conversation and some fresh air' and the next thing you know he is trying to bust a move on you. 

Said boy: How did I never notice you? You were so shy and now your so different-
*Iggy Azalea Fancy song comes on from inside the house*
Me: ItS MY SONG oh WHAT Dear LORD QUICK we MUst DanCE 
*struts to dance floor as fast as possible*

Yes, this actually happened. 

5) The worst party sin of all time  
Confessing your love for someone you do not actually really like that much, or confessing your love to someone who already has a girlfriend / boyfriend. 

The shame. 
As you can probably guess, this actually happened too.